Surgery # 2: CHECK!

Regarding the procedures today...

a) Sentinel Node dissection: ten nodes removed. Pathology report forthcoming in the next week or so. In order to aid the surgeon in the identification of the sentinel node(s), xray dye is injected into my breast. Normally, the fluid is handled as most waste material by the lymph system and is filtered from the blood and tissue. So theoretically, this injected dye would make it's way to ....a lymph node! So I was pricked my a big needle right into the most, or second-most sensitive part of my body with radioactive material and that xray dye would appear on my films as something like a road-map for the surgeon. Well, it didn't work. Poop! I just have one thing to say about that: OUCH.

b) Re-excission of left breast: gosh, I hope she got it all. I am getting a little worried about symmetry, ya know? I was talking with Mark's mother about my concern and she said, "As long as they both point up, you'll be alright!" Well, they are taking quite a lot of chunks per the pathology report. I told her, "Hey man, I am just hoping they both point in the same direction!"

c) Insertion of "P.A.S. Port": done. I feel kinda like me & the Bionic Woman have a little in common. Hehehehe...

My arm is a bit sore. It feels most comfortable if I don't move it too much. I keep my left arm close to my side. Unfortunately it hurts getting up from and going down to a supine position...but it's great once I get down there. But no worries = I have graduated to Darvocet from Vicodin. :-)

Thank you, Erin, for coming - Mark really needed the help and the nap.

Have a great day!

What I have to look forward to this week...

This week, I will be busy... * Monday, February 28 - surgery - lymphectomy, cleanup of remaining cancer, and port insertion * Tuesday, March 1 Morning - follow-up with surgeon and medical oncologist * Wednesday, March 2 Afternoon - appointment with genetic counselor * Thursday, March 3 Morning - MRI * Friday, March 4 - At this time, nothing is scheduled... Also, we already know that we meet with the radiation oncologist on Tuesday, March 8. The first chemo session is on Thursday, March 31. There is a prep meeting on Wednesday, March 30 in the afternoon, and the chemo session starts at 9:00 on Thursday. Since there is no eating or drinking after midnight, it's time to finish off the brownies, lumpia, cherry pie, leftover rigatoni, chicken wings, chocolate pudding, driscoll strawberries, 1/2 gallon vanilla ice cream, leftover Valentine's cookies, peanut M&Ms, Aladino's pizza (in honor of surgery), walnuts, hard-boiled eggs, cream of wheat, stewed tomatoes, cheese whiz, grapes, bananas, oranges, caesar salad, hawaiian bread, starbursts (for dessert), and to wash it all down, a nice big glass of Diet Pepsi... This will keep me in training for my 3 weeks before chemo, when I am supposed to visit all my favorite (or soon to be favorite) restaurants, since my taste buds are going to do a flip turn. P.S. I got a wig - it's blonde!!! OBTW - Just in case I haven't said it today - I love my Mark. He is wonderful and everyone should have one - but you can't have mine!!!

roses, violets, ...

Roses are red, violets are blue, ....my boob is purple. Too harsh? Okay: Roses are red, violets are blue, ....my breast is purple. I dunno...I would not want anyone to try to envision my purple boob. I think I'll SLEEP ON IT (If you know what I mean...)

Cheers! (couldn't pass that up)

I am not really sick.

I spent the day with my Auntie Josie today. She goes to dialysis three times every week. While she is not a diabetic, she ....er....*Renal Impaired". I forgot her disgnosis. Anyway, Uncle Luis usually takes her to the Renal Services Center, but today I went in his stead, as he is out of town on a retreat. I figured it would be a good chance for me to learn more about what being hooked up to a machine is like and would give me a chance to visit with Auntie Josie. Whew! I am so glad my chemo appointments will be at 9:00 am instead of 6:30 am like Auntie Josie! Seriously, though, I learned today to be thankful for my health. There are lots of sick people in the world. Besides the breast cancer, I am a healthy young lady. It was a good shot in the arm (pardon the expression)! I feel great! I know things will not be a bed of roses in the coming months, but things could be worse, right? I want to thank Auntie Josie for allowing me the honor of accompanying her to her dialysis session. I also want to thank the wonderful people there who take such good care of her and all of the others that are regular visitors of Diablo Renal Services in Pleasant Hill. I must apologize to the man who was assigned the chair next to Auntie Josie - I have such a loud voice and laugh - I am sure that is why he turned up his TV volume to MAXIMUM. Therefore, apologies are also in order to the guy on the other side of the room because the TV volume of our next door neighbor was interfering with HIS TV on the other side! And I promise, next time I will go for the Orange Juice instead of the Triple Mocha at 6:30 am. =:o

X-Rays and Ultrasounds

First I was scheduled to have my Diagnostic Mammogram at Diablo Radiology. Then we found an earlier appointment at Pacific Imaging, so that is who took the x-rays and the ultrasound films. That was on January 31st. Pacific Imaging then sent them over to Dr. Gorey's office. Dr. Gorey needed them for the surgery, which took place on February 3rd.

From there - who knows. We need them for the next surgery which is on Monday, February 28th. We also need a copy of them for the Neuroscan Group - they are going to give me a breast MRI next Thursday, March 3rd.

I went to Pacific Imaging last week (Feb 18) to request two copies (I wanted to put them up on this blog!) but they called me back and said they didn't have them - that they sent the originals to Dr. Gorey.

Dr. Gorey's nurses are pretty funny. Mary told us that they were sent back to Pacific Imaging on February 10th. Mary then double-checked to make sure she no longer had the x-rays and ultrasound images. So, Mark and I went back to Pacific Imaging on Tuesday after visiting Dr. Gorey. Again Pacific Imaging tells us they do not have our films.

Yeehaw! You should have seen Mark give them a little bit of Zigler-hell!

Mark: So, where is the "final resting place" for the films? P.I. rep #1: Uh...huh? Mark: Where do the films "live"?

P.I. rep #1: what? Mark: Who owns the films? P.I. rep #1: Oh, those films are our property. I think at this point Rep #1 was getting a bit frustrated at these probing questions and so she handed off to Rep #2.... Mark: Is it standard procedure to send original films out to the doctors' offices? P.I. rep #2: No. Mark: Interesting. Ok. We just came from Dr. Gorey's office and had her nurse search through the office and through her outgoing mail, as well in an effort to locate the images that her nurse says left her office on February 10th. We had her search because last week you told us that you did not have them when we requested copies on Feb 18th. P.I. rep #2: I think they are probably in the mailroom at John Muir Hospital. Mark: Ok, do you have the number for the Mail Room? P.I. rep #2: xxx-xxx-xxxx Mark: Why don't you give them a call? P.I. rep #2: Ok. (pauses and then whispers:) I am getting their voicemail. Mark: (whispers:) Leave a message.

Next Surgery: Monday February 28th

My next surgery is scheduled for Monday, February 28th. We found out yesterday after meeting with the Surgeon (Dr. GOREY...hehehehe). Gonna have more breast tissue removed (hopefully will get ALL of the cancer cells this time), will have a Sentinel Node Dissection done, and have a PORT inserted. The Port will enable delivery of the chemotherapy.

a picture of Kathleen

I have a lovely picture of one of my medical team of experts: Kathleen Fitterer. Unfortunately, I can't figure out how to get her picture up here! So...I will describe her! She is very pretty: blond and blue eyes, I think. She has a very nice smile and is quite funny. Mark and I had a great time talking with her about what chemotherapy is and what it will mean to me. I will work on getting her picture online. Oh yeah, I keep forgetting to bring in my Sony Clie with me when I go in for all of these tests - I can't take pictures if I don't have my camera! ~~~duh~~~

Testing, 1...2....3...

I feel like a sprinklerhead. I have so many holes in my arms and hands it's ridiculous. All of these nuclear tests require that I bleed....at least they seem to. I think my blood is trying to protest. It doesn't seem to want to come out anymore. So what happens is that I end up with several bruises on my arms for each attempt the medical technician makes in their vain (vein) attempt to get blood from me. Yesterday I had a MUGA test. I have forgotten what those letters stand for. It's like an EKG. They take blood from me and then "tag" it with some radioactive material...then re-inject it via the catheter it took 4 people to install in my arm....then watch as that tagged blood makes its way to my left ventricle. They want to know what my heart function is like under *normal* circumstances (as if being poked and pricked 4 times in a day is normal). They need to know my baseline because chemotherapy is sure to blow *normal* to smithereens.

from Feb 16th

We went to my appointment with my Medical Oncologist. He explained the results of the biopsy (lumpectomy) from last week. I will need more surgery - the surgeon did not get all of the tumor the first time. Additionally, the pathologist who did the analysis of the tissue also noted invasion of the cancer to the vascular system (that it had extended to a blood vessel). Not good. This surgery will probably be early next week, since I have a CT Scan this Friday (I have to wait until the chemicals are out of my system). There will be three things accomplished at this surgery: 1. Additional tissue will be removed in an effort to remove what remains of the cancer 2. Sentinel Node Dissection (for information on lymph involvement) 3. Installation of a "Port" (a catheter which will be installed in my arm and will run up my arm to my heart for delivery of chemotherapy regiments) We also added other tests to the batttery: * MRI of the right breast (I forget why). (I forget when, too.) Upcoming appointments: Feb ?? - Lab work (I am going to try today) ASAP - Meet with Surgeon again to discuss & schedule next surgery Feb 17 - Meet with Oncology Pharmacy Specialist to discuss treatment options and doctor's recommendations (training, too) Feb 17 - CT Scan of Abdomen and possibly the MRI, too. I mean, why not see how much radiation I can take at once? Feb ?? - Consultation with somebody else to discuss Gene Testing and blahblahblah. I am losing my clarity on these things...All I know is that I have to have all these things done as soon as they can do them, or as soon as they can fit me in. It is very hard because Iit doesn't really give me any time to do research on these things myself. It's scary because I have been seeing lots of health professionals and so quickly that we go to the next appointment and that one didn't know everything about the last visit with the last doctor...and was not even made aware of the proceduures that have been directed! It's like Mark said, "We need to call a meeting." So, this has been a hard night. I am worried. We are both worried and were not prepared for more surgery. It has not even been a week yet since the first one. And she was so sure she had gotten it all, "took extra to be sure" is what she told Mark. So I am not feeling good and will not be in today, please. I need to have time to think and read. I will complete the Self Evaluation Workbook and send it to you by the end of the day. That will be a break from all of the "names" and "numbers" and "percentages" and "increased rates of survival" and "decreased rate of recurrence" and "dosage for the first 14 weeks" and then "dosage for the 8 weeks following that". I will be relieved to not have to think "getting there 45 minutes before the appointment to get paperwork completed and my complete medical history" and won't (for the moment) have to be saddened when I am reporting each of my parents' cause of death. Questions? Me too. Thanks, Deirdre p.s. I will ask Mark to send one of his excellent emails about the appointments since this is a jumbled piece of emotional poo. Thank God for him.

well, this is me....the most recent one, I guess. 

The Beginning Of Our Journey

I have Invasive Breast Cancer. The team of Medical Professionals working on my case has proven it to me. I have checked the pathology report over and over for any errors, any typographical error, just anything that seems missing or or inconsistent to what I have been told thus far. I found it! They spelled my name wrong. So, it must be true. I have Invasive Breast Cancer. Here is the initial email I sent out to my family on our Yahoo! Group on February 14th:

Dear Family,

1. I have been diagnosed with Breast Cancer.

2. I am not going to lose my breast.

3. I am not going to die. (Well, you know... ;-)

Now that I've got that out of the way...

Ok, what?

• I detected a lump in my left breast early this year, possibly in December even.
• I had a clinical breast exam on Jan 24th. I was referred to radiology for a Diagnostic Mammogram (which includes Ultrasound Imaging). My doctor reviewed the radiologists' preliminary report and consulted me that same afternoon. This is when she told me my lump was "suspicious for invasive breast cancer". My doctor introduced me to the idea of cancer and helped prepare me for the full regiment of cancer therapies that I should expect. The first of which was to be a biopsy of the suspected cancerous lesion (hereafter referred to as "the lump").
• The following week, I met with a Breast Surgeon (also my Surgical Oncologist) where we reviewed my images and she performed a clinical exam. Based on several things, we decided that we would forego the biopsy and get the lump out as soon as possible.
• The lump was removed last week, Thursday. It was larger than she expected based on the ultrasound images. She believes she removed all of it. But we will see. I am waiting for her final pathology report and expect to have it by the week's end. I have recuperated from that outpatient surgery and am feeling fine.
• I had my Bone Scan today and also a Chest X-ray - and the technicians report that they look fine...for what it's worth. NOT my doctor's words...but I like 'em.

Other than not being able to go through security at the airport for the next 24 hours, the only side effects from today's radiation are the many paperclips that are sticking to my clothing and all of those compliments I got on my "beautiful blue eyes". Just kidding, no side effects! However I did have to drink about 48 ounces of fluids after getting my radioactive injection. That's hard on the bladder! Can you say "Radioactive Waste?"

What I am expecting next:

1. Full blood analysis

2. CT Scan of pelvis

3. I will undergo Chemotherapy

2. I will undergo Radiation Therapy

3. I will live to the ripe old age of 109 years old.

Please know that I have been quite busy in the last two weeks going from my primary care doctor's medical office to the Imaging Clinic to the operating room and to radiology, etc. I have just now had a moment to sit down and give you what I know. Even though I have not yet met with my Breast Surgeon to discuss the pathology report, I decided to seize the opportunity and just tell you what I do know and promise to update you as the details become available.

It is my plan to share with all of you all that I know – it is not only my desire to tell, it is my responsibility! Believe me; the last two weeks have been agonizing for me. To be told that there is something in my body that is suspicious of INVASIVE CANCER and not be able to know FOR SURE …even now…is one of the most difficult waits I have ever had to endure. As soon as one utters the diagnosis, questions arise. …questions for which even I do not yet have answers. However, as the time lapsed between January 24^th and today, some of you have heard. And, what I was afraid of happening has happened: some of you heard things that were not fact, and scared you. I apologize.

Anyway, this is the information I have. I will update you as soon as I have any more news. Mark may speak on my behalf. We are a team.

Don’t be afraid to call or write! I will need you all in ways I have not yet fully realized.

This is quite a bit of information and may be a bit detailed. So I summarize…

In a nutshell:

1. I have been diagnosed with Breast Cancer.

2. I am not going to lose my breast.

3. I am not going to die. (Well, you know... ;-)

I will write again with an update – I may even start a blog so as not to force-feed you all of the boring details.

And finally,

I love you all. I appreciate you and all efforts to “get this under control”. This is my task. I will do it…with your love and support. Not sure exactly what or when I will need …

And lastly,

(hehehehe…)

Take care of yourselves.

Be kind to everyone.

Do the best you can.

Believe that everyone is doing the best they can, too.

Love,

Deirdre & Mark